I Make Words

The Greatest Show On Earth, Season 1

2010-06-05T10:08:00.000-07:00

It's no secret that I'm in love with Buffy The Vampire Slayer. She's held my heart in a firm yet loving clawhold since I was eight. I've seen every episode upwards of fifty times, some probably over a hundred. Everyone has their security blanket, mine's a cute little girl that could kick your ass named Buffy. Today my friend Josh and I started re-watching it from season one. So I'm going to rank each and every episode from one to one-hundred forty-four. But that's a different blog for a different day. Today I'm going to be recapping season one. With out further ado.

Welcome to the Hellmouth - The pilot. Every show has one, not every show does it as well as this one. The thing about this episode that sticks out to me, aside from the slightly over-the-top dialogue between the two girls in the beginning, is the fact that it isn't all that dated. Sure, the film stock is a little grainy, and yes the outfits are very clearly nineties, but as a story it holds up. Which is pretty impressive considering that just a year or two before the X-Files pilot was filmed and that episode is dated like whoa. Also, in what can only be described as the purest form of serendipity, it's the first episode that I saw. Two seasons later on FX. I mean come on. What are the odds of that?
The Harvest - Also technically the pilot. WTTHM was originally two parts, this being the second. It's been split into two episodes for syndication and later airings. Buffy fights the Master's chosen vampire disciple. She knows he's the disciple because he has a symbol on his head that looks curiously similar to the Mercedes logo, but I digress. It's just as good as the first episode because, well, it technically is the first episode. It is the first time however that Buffy gets downright badass.
The Witch - The first non-vampire centric episode. Instead of vampires the main villain is the 1996 Sunnydale High Cheerleading tryouts. Buffy and her new friend Amy try out but find that weird things keep happening to other candidates. Eventually they find that Amy is the culprit, and also a witch. Turns out it wasn't Amy but her mom in her body. It's a great metaphor for parents forcing their dreams on their children. Great metaphors are one of Buffy's hallmarks.
Teacher's Pet - Xander is one of my favorite television characters of all time. And this is the first episode that he really shines in. A praying mantis-lady seduces him into going back to her house where she drugs and cages him. I feel I should mention that she doesn't look like a mantis when the actual seducing takes place. Anyway, the teacher that's killed as the inciting incident reminds me of my favorite teacher (Mr. Grant "G-Love" Love). He inspires Buffy to not listen to the negativity of all the other faculty. That was a great moment.
Never Kill A Boy On The First Date - The title is misinformative. No boys die on the aforementioned first date. But one almost does. This is a bittersweet episode because at first we're happy that Buffy gets a date with the boy she's had her eyes on but then she sees what dating her has done to him she breaks it off. Then there's a good moment with Buffy and Giles that has the first real instance of Giles stepping up to be Buffy's father-figure.
The Pack - Things get real in this episode. It's return of the metaphor as Xander gets possessed by Hyena spirit-demons. He gets new friends, starts picking on the weak, and even makes fun of Willow. Basically, he becomes a sixteen year old boy. He even assaults Buffy, and tries to force himself on her. I got to say though, the worst thing that happens is when the other possessed teens eat Principal Flutie. It's a very gruesome end.
Angel - It's finally here: the big reveal. Angel is a Vampire and Buffy, the slayer, loves him. They kiss and his gameface slips out. What's a girl to do? This girl tries to kill him. Fortunately for him she finds out that he has a soul. This is one of those exposition heavy episodes but it's doesn't feel like it. We get a lot of Angel's backstory, as the title would suggest. Not so much actual showing but there's going to be plenty of that next season.
I, Robot... You Jane - It's weird to think that the internet was around back in 1997. It's weird to think that there was a primitive form of internet dating then too. That's what this episode is about, Willow dating a boy online. Turns out he's a kidnapping demon trapped in the internet. Happens all the time. This is why I love this show: things that everyone goes through in real life are translated into monsters for Buffy and her friends to fight.
Puppet Show - The talent show is frightening. All those people watching you try to do something you're sort of good at. It's nerve-wracking. I've been in a few and I always get flu-like symptoms. Now imagine if not only were you forced to be in said talent show but someone was killing students and taking their hearts and brains to hide for another X amount of years. Also there's a talking ventriloquist's dummy. Not as much metaphor but it's still a good episode.
Nightmares - This is in my top ten favorite episodes of the entire series. Nightmares become reality, which, granted isn't the most original episode idea, but the execution is perfect. Buffy fears three things: letting the Master out, becoming a vampire and her dad not wanting to spend time with her. That last one is heart wrenching. He flat out tells her that she's the reason that he and her mom split up and that she's a terrible child. Sarah Michelle Gellar gives me chills with her reaction.
Out Of Mind, Out Of Sight - This episode is about a girl that everyone ignores until she turns invisible. That is rough. And there's some good phelbotinum for the next episode in the form of a lost codex.
Prophecy Girl - In the final episode of the season Buffy finds out that she's supposed to face the Master and die. As someone who's seen television you know deep down that she can't die because she's the title character. But then she dies, even if only for a minute, and you are shocked. But the crux of this episode is when she finds out that she's supposed to die. SMG shows pain like no one else. But when the Master's minions kill some students and Willow finds their bodies Buffy decide that she has to stop him. And that's Buffy in a nutshell; she a regular girl until her friends are involved and then she's a superhero.

So that's season one. I'll be doing one of these for each season. It should take a few weeks but it'll happen.

Best!

This Post--

2010-04-02T09:56:00.000-07:00

Is a cop out. The blog I originally wanted to do is going to take a bit longer than I though. But in the interest of repeat viewings I'll give you this: I am going to make the ultimate Cult TV Pantheon. What does that mean? It means I'll be comparing characters fro the best cult show to the greek pantheon of gods. Does that interest you? Then you should come back next Friday. It'll be awesome, I promise.

Things To Consider When Making A World

2010-03-26T15:56:00.000-07:00

Because tomorrow I'll be making a society for a new comic idea I thought I should explain how I go about doing that. Now to be perfectly clear I'm technically world building. But I think calling what I'm doing tomorrow isn't exactly building a whole world so I'm society building. I'll be explaining how I make worlds and then explain what I mean by society building. It's also good to know that "world-building" doesn't mean making a new planet. It means creating a reality different from our. Of course, in that reality you might not live on Earth, in which case you would need to build a new planet.

The only reason to build a world is to give a story a place to live, when the story wouldn't necessarily fit into the world we already have. So to start I always look at what my story needs. Usually this isn't too hard to figure out. If the story takes place after the apocalypse, you need an apocalyptic world. If it's about a wizard that fights trolls, it will probably be in a medieval land. The story is key to starting the world-building process. My rule of thumb is only make what you need. If you have a cool detail about your world, don't shoe-horn it into your story. But if the story has a neat little factlet, make sure that it makes sense within the world.

The next thing I consider is my characters, or more specifically how my characters fit into and react to this world. What are these characters in this world instead of any other one? Plot makes a story cool, but characters make a story real. In my comic "Nuclear Family", I have five main characters. Each react to the world in a different way. Sage wants to fix, Millie wants to keep it from destroying itself, Grit wants to figure it out, Meredith wants to fit into it, and Oliver wants survive it. They all live in the same world, a world that's been blown to hell but nuclear war and god knows what else. I had a thought about fossilized cities. That lead to fossil bombs which lead to the idea for a character who's parents were fossilized.

The last thing I do is put everything together with the little details. How do people live? Who rules? What are the settings like? Things like that. By the time I get here I usually have everything pretty much nailed down. Sometimes building worlds aren't that involved, sometimes it get's extremely detailed. at the end of the day you just need to have fun with it and it will turn out cool.

Fight The Future

2010-03-19T14:14:00.000-07:00

Today I started writing a script. No preparation, no outline, just a thought. And what sparked this thought? 711 of all things. You see, I have a love of post-apocalyptic fiction. And a hallmark of the apocalypse is scavenging what's left. 711 is a great place to start, especially if it's right next door to you. I was just waiting for my chicken tenders to be ready and usually when I do that I prepare for the apocalypse by seeing what would earn it's weight in my backpack. That got wheels turning and when I got home I started writing.

The basic plot is about a guy who has to travel across the country to find his girlfriend after a nuclear attack. The attack happened two weeks prior and everyone that survived has been holed up since then. It's definitely a work in progress but I like where it could go.

Best!

Unnecessary Amounts Of Television

2010-03-12T12:23:00.000-08:00

That's what i should have called this blog. I just looked over at my TV on DVD shelf and realized that I have way too many shows, at least for any normal human. I have 186 seasons of 80 different shows. That seems to be a lot. In fact, I've run out of room on my shelf. I need do some pretty clever rearranging soon. and I need to get a shelf. All the rearranging in the world won't fit ten pounds of shit into a five pound bag. Check it out to the left.

I haven't even watched it all. Right now I'm trying to knock out Castle and The Colony by my lonesome. I can't watch season 3 or 4 of Digimon until my friends want to, because we Digimarathon them for eighteen straight hours, which is brutal when four in the morning rolls around. My roommate/bff and I are trying to watch the entire series of X-Files, of which we're on season 2 (We'd be done now but we accidentally took a year off. Oops). I started watching Season 4 of 24, 1 of Mad Men, and 1 of Monk over two years ago but I decided to watch other things instead and never got back to them. Yesterday I bought three seasons of Lois and Clark: The New Adventures of Superman, completing the set (plus, they were under $15 each. Where else am I going to find them for that cheap?). On top of all this I really want to re-watch Veronica Mars, which would only set me back more.

I have a big problem. I understand that. I'm out of control. But I love TV. Some day I'll be able to get whatever I want and It'll be a tax write-off. That's going to be a great day.

Best!

So much for that 'One blog a week' thing

2010-03-05T14:42:00.000-08:00

I realize that just two weeks after the last post, I'm finally getting around to posting. But since I hate blogs that's every post is "sorry for not posting" I won't apologize, I'll just try to keep the promise starting today.

First off: I went to Astronautalis on Wednesday. It was absolutely amazing. That guy is something else. He raps about the battle of Trenton and diving bells and being a con-man in the early 20th century. And his freestyle is so good I can't really explain it. Go here to hear some of his music.

Second: I'm writing yet another comic. This one is surprisingly fun. I started out with less than an idea and now I'm working with an artist on it. It's pretty exciting because we're making the story together instead of me saying "Here's a thing I thought up. Go draw it.

There is no third.

Best!

The First Day Of The Rest Of My Career

2010-02-12T09:07:00.000-08:00

Starting today I'm am no longer an aspiring writer. Today I am a writer. I've got a gameplan and everything. I'll walk you through it:

Starting monday I'll be putting in 40 hours a week of writing. At least 20 actually writing and 20 or less plotting.
If I don't the urge or inspiration to write, I will anyway, inspiration be damned!
I will constantly be developing new ideas, (not a problem for me) but not at the expense of current projects.
I'll be pursuing any opportunity I can (This I've already been doing, but I needed another bullet point).

So that's my game plan. At least partly. I've got some irons in the fire and hopefully soon I'll have a lot more to talk about. Lastly, I wish I could draw. That would be sweet.

Best!

Pantsing

2010-02-08T10:30:00.001-08:00

I'm going to try to do a blog at least once a week for the foreseeable future. Unfortunately, I'm not that interesting and I tend to take all the inspiration I get and funnel it into other projects I'm working on right now. But that's okay because of a wonderful process known as "Pantsing", spelling may not be accurate. Pantsing is process of writing wherein you just type and type and type until things make sense. It comes from the phrase "flying by the seat of your pants." I hope it's working.

Some weeks will be small updates, a la this one, where I just tell you what's going with me, the blog, or whatever. Others will be fairly lengthy and will more than likely cover many different topics. Sort of like the last one "Fantasy Lantern Draft". This doesn't mean that I'll only post once a week. Sometimes I might post more but I wouldn't put all those eggs in that particular basket just. See you next time.

Best!

Fantasy Lantern Draft

2010-01-30T20:16:00.001-08:00

DC Comics is having a huge crossover event right now. Without boring you with the details I'll just tell you that it focuses on the Green Lantern Corps and the other six lantern corps fighting off the Black Lantern Corps. Each corps is a different color (according to the ROYGBIV color acronym) and each color represents a different emotion (Red=Rage, Orange=Avarice, Yellow=Fear, Green=Willpower, Blue=Hope, Indigo=Compassion, and Violet=Love). There was recently an article on Comic Book Resources about a Fantasy Lantern Draft. Basically people all over the internet are picking people from all different fandoms to make the perfect lanterns. The rules are simple: for each corps you pick one person from all of comics (or in this case anywhere). Below is my draft and my reasons for why I picked them. I also hyperlinked them for your convenience.

Red: Jakita Wagner. Jakita likes anything that keeps her from being bored. Rage is anything but boring. She throws herself into every fight with a smile on her face and song in heart. Sure that song is "Murder Train" by the Foreskins but hey, whatever. She's not necessarily an angry person but she gets caught up in the moment very easily and that would be enough to turn her into a Red Lantern. Runner Up: ALL CAPS JEFF MOREIRA.
Orange: Jack Horner. Jack's entire motivation, through out both his series and Fables, has been money. And sex. And fame. Basically the things that any and all greedy people want. He's the quintessential orange lantern. He save the girl; it's only because he wants to get some. He helps break out a fellow prisoner; he expects him to take Jack to treasure. It never ends. That's why he's be a great Orange Lantern. Runner Up: Howard "The Weasel" Monague.
Yellow: The Grinning Man. This one is extremely personal. I have never, never, been more afraid than the night I stumbled upon the Grinning Man. The thought of him terrifies me, the accounts only make it worse. He's a mysterious figure seen in New Jersey and Virginia who appears and terrifies people. Read the accounts, you'll be afraid too. He's the perfect Yellow Lantern. Runner Up: Angelus.
Green: Buffy Summers. This one was hard. Originally I had her as a Blue Lantern, because she inspires hope. But then I thought "In the end all Buffy has is Buffy. And that's enough." Green Lanterns are in a similar position. Buffy has shown that she can lead and has more willpower than anyone else ever and I will fight you if you disagree. She's my hero and I get a little protective. Sorry. Runner Up: Elijah Snow.
Blue: Gordon Freeman. This one was easy once Buffy was cemented in the Green Lantern Corps. He's known through out the entire Half-Life universe as the "One Free Man." He inspires people to resist the combine and fight back. But most of all, he gives people hope. And that's kind of a requirement for this gig. The best part is he does this without saying a single word. How's that for stoic? Runner Up: Link.
Indigo: Doctor Who. The Doctor, more specifically the tenth doctor feels great compassion for every single creature throughout the universe and throughout time. That's a lot of people and things to care about. In one episode he has to basically put these four terrible people in a never-ending torture loop. He doesn't want to but he has to. In another episode he saves a group of monsters because he's the Doctor. And he cures people. Runner Up: John "J.D." Dorian.
Violet: Midnighter. I know what you're saying (well, maybe not actually you but the proverbial you) "How come the gay guy is the pink lantern?" Well, over-sensitive liberal character I made up for this example, it because Midnighter is more in love with Apollo than anyone else I could think of. He's done crazy things for and because of love and I think that more than qualifies him to be a violet lantern. Runner Up: Kitty Pryde.

So there's my draft. I'll be tweeting them all tomorrow in a smaller, 140 character bursts.

Best!

The Playlist

2010-01-28T20:10:00.000-08:00

I do a lot of writing. Not as much as I should but a lot none the less. I've heard a lot of people say that writing to music is too distracting. I respectfully disagree. I think that some music too distracting, so I went through my admittedly smallish library of music (2000-ish) and picked out fifteen songs that I put on a shuffling repeat. The order isn't important, the songs are. These probably won't work for anyone but me but I thought it would be a good insight into my musical inspirations. They're linked for your convenience. Also, there are a few repeat artists. Some think that's unnecessary but I think shut the hell up.

01. Secrets Of The Undersea Bell - Astronautalis

02. You Were Born To Save The World - Pixelh8

03. tip eht fo mottob - Shael Riley And The Doubleice Backfire

04. Remains - Maurissa Tancharoen & Jed Whedon

05. Heads Up, Hearts Down - I Fight Dragons

06. This Must Be The Place - Miles Fisher

07. Disloyal Order Of Water Buffaloes - Fall Out Boy

08. Turn On Me - The Shins

09. Men's Needs - The Cribs

10. No One Sleeps When I'm Awake - The Sounds

11. How To Fire A Gun - Shael Riley And The Doubleice Backfire

12. Welcome To The Black Parade - My Chemical Romance

13. Money - I Fight Dragons

14. I Will Repossess Your Heart - Marc With A C

15. Trouble Hunters - Astronautalis

So there it is. I hope you found this enlightening.

Best!

November 22, 2010

2010-01-16T14:07:00.000-08:00

That's the day I'll be published. At the latest. I have a story being published at Incubator Press's third volume of their third anthology entitled Never Look Back: Jubilee. My story's about a guy who cleans up other people's illegal messes. It's a gritty crime noir with some pretty cool dialogue. It'll be very fun.

Another thing I'll be doing in the future is going home to NH. I get all sentimental when I think about so, see you later.

Best!

Almost forgot I had a famous visitor on the blag today. He's an amazing musician named Pixelh8. I tweeted him saying home much I like his album "And The Revolution" and he checked out my site. That's pretty cool.

Let's Give It Up For The New Year

2010-01-09T19:12:00.000-08:00

It's been a month since I've last blogged and not much has changed. Still working on breaking into comics. It's difficult and frustrating and time consuming. But it's also a little fun. You know, in a very unfunny way. If that makes a lick of sense. I spend a lot of time on websites that cater to the up and comers. Mostly looking for work or a good artist for free. No luck on that front yet but hey. I do have Juan, who sort of spoiled me by being so good. I look at people that I may have asked to collaborate with before I found him and realize that they really aren't that good. Oh well. It'll happen sooner or later.

That's all I really have for now. Oh yeah, IT FREAKING SNOWED IN FLORIDA TODAY! What the hell is up with that, right?

For Those About To Rock...

2009-12-07T07:01:00.000-08:00

I hope the title doesn't conjure too many images of AC/DC. That really wasn't my intent. I'm actually going to talk about the last month and a half or so. Including some music I've been listening to, but we'll get there later.

So first of all, I've had the most hectic week of my life. Maybe not my whole life. But top five, easy. We filmed our 16mm shoot. It was three twelve-hour days that started at six but I was there by five-thirty. I had probably the second easiest job on set but I was still running around like a crazy person with his head cut off. For purposes of this last simile, assume that this crazy person is half chicken. that way he can still move without his head. I was the 2nd Assistant Director, which basically means talent wrangler. I had to keep the actors happy which is a very easy job, comparatively. It was really fun. Some of the actors and a few other crew members had a nice little bonding experience over what our porn names would be. To find your porn name, it's the name of your first pet and the street you grew up on (Mine's Junker Country by the way). On the last day of shooting I got home and fell asleep for an hour. Then I fell asleep again at nine. It was nice.

On the comic front, I have half the pages from Juan. That means it's time to pay him half the money. I just need to find a western union, which despite their advertisements are surprisingly hard to find. I'm excited because it means a almost half way done with the first issue. I plan on having it on the shelves by June. But that's a different problem for a different post. I'll have something for you to look at.

Remember when I said I would talk about bands. Well, you're wait is over. You can exhale. It's no secret that I'm a nerd. The reason it's no secret is because I talk about it all the time. Well in july I started getting into Nerd Music. It's not a genre so much as it's a movement. It's people singing about things like pirates and ninjas and cats that can't spell. But it's also people using Nintendo sound cards to enhance their music. I can't believe I didn't get into it sooner. Anyway, I saw I Fight Dragons, who uses the aforementioned NES sound cards, and they were amazing. I even talked to them after the show and got them to sign a copy of their CD for me. It was cool. Other bands that rock pretty hard are Shael Riley and The Double Ice Backfire, Marc With a C, and The Protomen. None of which sound like each other. But that's the point of Nerdcore. It's a little bit of everything.

I ran out of things to talk about so I guess I'll be off. I'd also like to mention that I'm going home in eleven days. Oh sweet New Hampshire, I can almost feel your snow in my boots. And I'd be remiss if I didn't mention Scrubs premiered last tuesday. Watch that. I didn't realize how long this post was. Hope I don't come off as long winded. I just have a lot to say.

Best!

Cover by Rob Jones

2009-10-29T20:09:00.000-07:00

Here's the cover. It's done by a different artist than the one who's drawing the comic proper. His name is Rob Jones and I found him on Penciljack.com, which is probably one of the best website there is for aspiring comic writers, pencilers, inkers, colorists, and letterers. It how I found both the artists on my comic. I just wish that there was an easier way to pitch to publishers. All of their submission guidelines are really tough. i understand that they want to scare away anyone who doesn't really want to do this and isn't willing to put in the effort but man, some of them just sound mean-spirited. But you gotta do what you gotta do to make it in any business and the comic industry is no different.

Thank god for that little voice in my head that keeps yelling ideas at me when I try to sleep or watch TV or generally do anything. If I could turn my brain off for even a minute I would have a nice moment of quiet non-reflection. I envy the unimaginative sometimes. Only sometimes though. The rest of the times I go "Wow, I thought of that? Awesome. I'm going places." It sounds conceded but I don't believe in me how can I expect anyone else to?

Look! It's got a name!

2009-10-21T19:56:00.000-07:00

NUCLEAR_FAMILY. That's the title of my comic. It was the title of the first arc but I didn't have a name for the series proper and decided that it needed one. Nuclear Family worked better as the first arc. It made sense because a nuclear family is defined as the immediate members of one's family. See the irony? Because they aren't related at all? And they live in a post nuclear war torn america? Either way it was clever. It's still clever. But I digress.

Here's page six. Enjoy!

Just A Quicky #1

2009-10-01T06:59:00.000-07:00

Here's a few more pieces of background art for my comic. I think they look really cool. There's some graffiti on a car in one that says "Fuck". To me that's hilarious because people, by and large are so un-creative that they only write swears on things. I didn't tell him to draw that, by the way. It just happened. I'll be posting the updated Meredith character model later this week.

Slowly But Surely

2009-09-23T10:41:00.000-07:00

Awhile back I got the urge to write a comic set in Post-Apocalyptic America. The idea stemmed from a thought that popped into my head: Post-Apocalyptic Private Investigator. It doesn't sound that strange right? Well think about it again. Once society ends, there are a lot of jobs that go the way of Dodo: Actors, writers, and artists to name a few. Another one is private eye. What need is there for some one to find things and follow people? None. So what if someone wanted to be a P.I? He would be the only one in the wastes. At the very least that makes it easy for me to write him and the rest of the characters being all over the place. He's just on a new case that takes him to new places. It's a fantastic plot device.

But I'm off topic. The point is that I wrote a script for this story and went looking for someone to draw it. I found someone. His name is Juan Romera and he's Argentinean. He has a great style and liked the script. He recently sent me the initial character designs (Pictured Above) and I got very excited (Keep in mind that the two characters on the outsides will have minor changes to them). So he's drawing now and soon I'll see the first pages of my comic. After that I'm going to start pitching it to different comic publishers and hopefully I'll have a book on the stands by December. Keep in mind it might not be on every stand because it's an indy book from a first time writer but there's always a way to find it. Now it just needs a name.

Recipe #1: CFS Stew

2009-08-30T11:44:00.000-07:00

Today, I make stew. It's been a few weeks since the last time I made stew and I figured it was about time. I thought I'd give a recipe of sorts for this stew. It isn't very hard but it does take awhile. And believe you me it is worth it.

INGREDIENTS

2 Pre-cooked rotisserie chickens

2 Bags of carrots (of 10 to 15 carrots each)

1 Bag of celery

1 Bag of potatoes, you can pick the kind but I prefer the big yellow ones.

1 Clove of garlic

1 Box of Goya chicken bullion

1 Box of chicken broth

1 Medium to large pan

2 Large pots

1 Strainer

1 Long wooden spoon

PROCESS

Take 1 potato, 2 carrots, 1 celery stick, and 1 piece of garlic. Peel the carrots and potato, then cut every thing. It's important to not throw the peelings away.

Get a medium to large pan, pour in olive oil and slosh it around until it covers the pan. Now put every thing in the pan once it starts sizzling. Keep it in there until it's all brown, stirring occasionally.

Take the two rotisserie chickens and peel all the meat off. Put the bones, skin and other miscellanea in one bowl and all the useable meat in another. this should take about a half-hour.

Once all the meat is deboned, put it in the fridge, you won't need it for a while. Take all the bones, browned vegetables and peelings and throw it in a Large pot, and I mean a really big pot, along with 2 packets of chicken bullion, another piece of garlic, and 1 cup of chicken broth. Fill the pot with water up to three to four inches from the top.

Put the pot, which by now should be heavy with bones and water and such, on to the stove top. Put it on high and wait until it boils.

Once it does boil, stir it for a few seconds and drop the heat until medium.

This is the longest part. Let it boil on medium for about three hours, stirring every twenty minutes or so. Add in what ever you think it needs. I usually drop in some salt, garlic powder, and more chicken bullion every now and then. If there's one thing I learned from my dad about cooking it's not to worry about exact proportions and time, just feel it out. But not literally because, hey, boiling.

About an hour and a half into cooking, start peeling potatoes, and carrots. Cut the carrots, potatoes, and celery into good sized pieces.

Once those three hours are up take it off the heat. Put another big pot, this one doesn't have to be quite as big as the other, in the sink. Put a strainer in the pot. Now carefully pour the contents of the Big big pot through the strainer into the smaller big pot. Once all the broth is out throw the bones and such away, you won't be needing it anymore. Make sure the strainer is one of those wire-y ones or else bones might slip through.

Pour the broth back into the Big big pot, after making sure that there are no bones or other ephemera in said pot.

Dump all of the chicken and vegetables into the pot with the broth. I usually put another piece of garlic in with it but that's just a personal preference. I also put 1 packet of chicken bullion and 1 more cup of chicken broth in there with a cup or two of water, to give it more broth.

Put it back on the stove on high. When it boils, drop it to medium again. Stir it every ten minutes or so. Let it sit on medium for an hour.

After the hour is up, it's ready to eat. But caution! it will be boiling lava hot. I usually let it sit for five to ten minutes. When it cools off a little there will be a film over the top of it. this part is delicious, just so you know.

And there you have it, CFS Stew. What does the "CFS" stand for you ask? That's simple: Chock Fulla S#!+. It's aptly named because it is full to the brim with chicken and veggies. I was sick of getting stew that was basically broth and you had go on a scavenger hunt for the good stuff. that's why I put so much in it. Enjoy it with your friends and family. It'll feed a bunch of people. I hope you like it.

Best!

The Device Has Been Modified

2009-08-11T16:46:00.000-07:00

One of my favorite games in the whole wide world is Portal. This game is wildly inventive, crazy intriguing and very, very fun. The best thing about this game is the fact that you can keep playing it over and over again and it never gets boring

Lately I've been obsessed with Portal's backstory. It fits into the Half-Life universe (which is so in depth I won't even talk about it anymore) And I've been trying to uncover how. I know that the main company is the business rival of Half-Life's big company. I know pretty much all the knowledge that is available. But i need more.

I'm going crazy because I want to play portal but my Xbox red ringed and I need to send it out to Microsoft to be fixed. To cope with these itches I've watched youtube videos of someone playing, just to take the edge off a little bit. It's a sickness that need so be remedied.

The reason for this is that I've been trying to write a script for the Portal movie. I have a 3 day weekend this week so I'm going to spend it writing. It sounds exciting, I know.

Best!

It's Been A While

2009-08-02T13:10:00.001-07:00

Let's just say that I've been busy. Classes for this month were winding down and I didn't exactly have a lot of time to myself. Well, I did but I spent it watching Dollhouse and catching up on my DVR's. Which was fine by me. I did do a lot of writing too. Oh. I think I just found the focus of this blog.

So first off, I like writing. Not so much like. I need to write. I have too damn many thoughts in my head and need a way to get them all out. That way is writing.

This week I've been kind of obsessed with a comic. Actually I've been obsessed with it for a while, but I digress. That comic is Planetary, written by Warren Ellis and masterfully drawn by John Cassaday. I've been trying to turn that into a TV series. There is so much that could be expanded there and I think I'm just the boy for the job.

In addition to that, I've been writing my own stuff: two TV pilots (That the term for the first episode, case you didn't know). One is a zombie show that focuses on a Global Response Team that goes around to human enclaves giving them supplies like food and solar panels and stuff. The other is a supernatural high school show that, I won't lie, borrows heavily from Buffy. It let me write a scene that made me laugh for an hour. It's something that reminded me of Elie, which is always a good thing.

Lastly, just today I got hit with the idea to make Portal, an awesome game, into a movie. I'm breaking it down right now so I can have a better grasp on it when I start writing it. The game is about a girl who wakes up in a testing center and is given a gun that can make, you guessed it, portals. It goes a lot deeper than that but I'm running out of things to say. I think this one might write itself.

Best!

Sunday, Sunday, Sunday

2009-07-19T08:28:00.000-07:00

So I'm sitting here listening to music and all of a sudden Irish Whiskey comes on. Cool song, alright. Then Society by Eddie Vedder, ok. Then Knights of Cydonia by Muse, The Story by Brandi Carlisle, and Girl All The Bad Guys Want by Bowling For Soup. At that point I started freaking out. Those are the songs that each remind me of a different one of my friends from up in the NH (Josh, Elie, Layton, Jacob[who's down here but still], and NH in general). I think it's a sign. It's weird how they all came in rapid succession like that.

I want to go back already. At least I have a relatively easy month. Aside from advanced lighting I really don't have any classes. Documentary is all about post production on the doc we filmed. I think It'll be cool.

I found a letterer for my comic. He's good and he's cheap: just the way I like it. I just need to get a hold of Paul. I'm excited to see how the art is coming out.

Also, my tattoo healed. Just thought I would mention it. No more need to put aquaphor on it every hour. Sweet. And now I want another one. I've got some Ideas but not a lot of money. We'll see how it goes.

Best!

p.s. I just finished reading the entire series of Planetary by Warren Ellis and John Cassaday. Wow. It was the best comic I've ever read. And I've read a lot of comics.

Sometimes I Feel Like A Snowman

2009-07-06T20:04:00.000-07:00

And by that, I mean I don't belong in florida. I got back from the NH yesterday and man do I miss it. I felt great all week when I was up there and today, my first day back, I awoke to a headache. Which is awesome I know. But enough about my bitchings let me get you caught up.

First off, it's been a while since my last blog. The reason for this is that I found it very difficult to keep my mouth shut about surprising my dad for his birthday. You see, my dad had no idea that I was coming home for his birthday. I showed up and he lost his shit. It was really cool. But everything I wanted to type on here was basically about how excited i was to be going back to New Hampshire and because my dad frequently reads my blog, I couldn't do that. So I just avoided it like the plague.

Secondly, I got a new tattoo. I love getting inked because afterwards, you will never be the same again. It's just a really cool feeling. Too bad I couldn't get one of the one I wanted. It was kind of friend dependent and one of my friends was really busy the whole day. No big deal.

Also, Royal pains is a very good show but it needs more Tucker and Libby. I love those two characters.

Best!

Today is my birthday and I'll etcera if I want to

2009-06-20T09:11:00.000-07:00

So today I turn the big 2-0. It's weird, to paraphrase Jacob, I thought that when i got to this age I would be older. It's my first birthday away from my friends and family up in the NH. Oh well. I have class all day anyway so it's not like I'll be bored. And Me and some friends went to the movies last night. I think I'm going to buy myself a bike. That seems like something that I should get. That or a pet hedgehog. Unfortunately I'm pretty sure that you need a special license to own one of those in the states (Damn you England!). In any case I can barely take care of myself so I don't need a tiny rodent that needs caring for. I wouldn't mind it if my parents air mailed me my dog Rango though. I miss that little spaz something fierce.

In other news I just finished my comic script. I've had some people read it, a few friends and my Auntie Patti. I hope they liked it. I mean I know they did but none of them really read comics so I'm not sure if they like because i wrote it or because it's good. I don't really care one way or another, as long as it makes feel something. There's an old wrestling adage: A bad reaction is better than no reaction. I'm sending it to my artist tomorrow to see what he thinks. Then I have to find a letterer on this one website that a pretty awesome writer gave me. And in september I try to pitch it to my favorite Editor at Dragoncon. It's weird how things are starting to come together.

Best!

One Week Later

2009-06-07T21:01:00.000-07:00

It's been a whole week and I not much has happened. I started two new classes, Documentary Filmmaking and Editing. Doc, as the kids call it, is alright. We learn about the theory of documentaries, which is cool. Editing is better though. We're learning, hold on a second, editing. Video editing to be specific. Film editing involves dark rooms and scissors. It's interesting because I'm not very good at editing so I'm learning how to be not not very good.

There was one big thing that happened on Thursday. I went to see the Sounds. My favorite band ever. They put on one hell of a show. There were even times where, swear to god, the lead singer Maja (pronounced Maya) Ivarsson winked at me. It was amazing. Every single song was even better live. When all was said and done I had had one of the best nights I could have had in Orlando. Also today I saw UP and I cried a lot. My eyes still have that dried tear feel in them. it kind of sucks,

Best!

Wahoo, E3

2009-06-01T19:06:00.000-07:00

I've spent the better part of the day watch G4's E3 coverage. For those that don't know what that is, it's the worlds largest gaming conference. There were some crazy awesome games revealed today like Left 4 Dead 2, Splinter Cell: Conviction, and Crackdown 2. And this was only day one. Tomorrow there is more and the same with wednesday and thursday and I think friday. It totals up to a whopping 22 hours of coverage. And because I have eight hours of class tomorrow that means my DVR will be working overtime. I can't wait. I love video games and this just gets me excited for the stuff coming out this year. One of the crazy things that Microsoft revealed is Project Natal, which is kind of a scary thing. it is basically a motion sensor that senses your motion. Meaning that you are the controller. Peter Moleneux, the guy who created Fable, has made an Artificial Intelligence that can interact with you. That's the begining of Skynet. How freaking scary is that? He knows your name, he can read your facial expressions and more importantly he can tell what you are feeling. His name is MILO and he is the enemy. Tell your friends. The robot apocalypse is upon us. I've already started fortifying my house. Assassin's Creed 2 also looks pretty cool.

Issue 1, technically draft 1

2009-05-26T12:41:00.000-07:00

I finally did it. I finished the first issue of my comic. All I have to do now is read the printed out version to see if everything works and possibly do a second draft but hopefully not. I should be good. But just to be sure I'm going to let a few people read it to see if it makes sense to them. Then I send it off to Paul up in Winchendon, Mass and find a letterer on PencilJack. There's a lot more to it than that but I feel like if I describe everything in graphic detail you'll be so bored you don't ever go back on the webnet. Hopefully you're still here.

Anyway, yeah. I'm really excited. In September i'm going to dragon con so I can pitch it to Scott Allie of Dark Horse Comics. If I'm the luckiest person in the world he'll hire me and I get to write comics monthly. Fingers crossed.

Best!

Allergies

2009-05-23T19:17:00.000-07:00

I know that I already posted an hour ago but I need to talk about this right now. My allergies, which have usually been relatively tame, are kicking my ass hardcore style. It looks like I have pink eye and to be honest I really hope I don't. Couple these allergies with the fact that I have over active tear glands and it looks like i just watched the Scrubs Finale or an episode of Extreme Makeover: Home Edition. I am sick and tired of being sick and tired. It feels like I'm leaking. I don't like that feeling. That feeling sucks. To make matters worse, I shoot my commercial tomorrow and I have a very hard time spelling tomorrow. I actually almost spelled it wrong while griping. Why can't they just put a second "m" in it? But I digress.

The worst part about this is it makes me miss my mum. She used to take care of me when I was sick. I could just lay in bed and she would bring me soup and stuff. Being an adult fucking sucks. The only good thing is that I can swear in my blogs and not care who sees. Except maybe my grandparents. I wouldn't want them to read this.

Woo Hoo!

2009-05-23T16:47:00.000-07:00

I just saw that I had five followers and then I got wicked excited. Then I saw that the new followers my my friends Matt and Layton and I got even more excited. I haven't seen them in a while (Layton since Christmas and Matt since like 1946. It's been a while to say the least.) Awesome. I should call those guys. I mean I talk to Layton often anyway but still.

In other news I only need to write five more pages of issue 1. It's so close I can aste it. I meant to write taste it and since I've decided to not correct any typos while writing that is going to stay like it is.

Best!

p.s. My end parenthetical in the first paragraph looks like a one-eyed guy smiling. That was completely unintentional. I promise.

2009-2010 Broadcast Season

2009-05-18T11:13:00.000-07:00

IN: Dollhouse(!), Bones, Chuck, Scrubs, Castle, Better Off Ted, Big Bang Theory, Fringe, House, Heroes, The Office, Smallville, Supernatural. UPDATE: How I Met Your Mother and Gary Unmarried.

OUT: Terminator: The Sarah Conner Chronicles, The Unusuals, Life. UPDATE: Cupid and maybe Reaper (see comment. I'm already writing a letter. Plus it's good to know somebody I didn't specifically tell to read my blog reads my blog.)

PROGNOSIS: Even though CBS and The CW haven't released their upfronts yet, I am very hopeful. I only need Gary Unmarried and How I Met Your Mother from CBS and Reaper from the CW an I will have a good year. I'm sad about Terminator, Life and the Unusuals but Dollhouse and Castle's renewal make me infinitely happy. That said there are a few Pilots that I hope get picked up. Eva Adams looks great. It's about a womanizer who finally gets his when he is turned into a woman for some unknown reason. It's a good contender and hopefully it'll get made. NBC's Day One and ABC's Flash Forward (not a remake of Disney Channel's show from the early '90s starring Jewel Staite and Ben Foster) are both post-apocalyptic, which I love, and were ordered to series. So they year is off to a good start. I'll keep you posted. Man I'm such a TV nerd.

Best!

So Tired It Hurts

2009-05-17T07:38:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was my first day of shooting for our free form and holy crap was it draining. I had to get up a 4 am, carry 30 lbs of bagels from Android's to the school and then we had a twelve hour shooting day. It was a little crazy. We finished about an hour early so that was nice but it was still an eleven hour day. I got home and took a three hour nap before going to the movies. I got back at 1:30 am and went to sleep. Unfortunately for me, because I'm so used to waking up early, I got up at 8:30 am. Now I can't fall back asleep and as the title of this blog suggests, I'm so tired it hurts.

What A Day

2009-05-12T14:01:00.001-07:00

I was hit by a car today. Slammed right into my left side and crushed the bike I was on. Best part is because I was to shocked at having just been hit by a car, I didn't get the lady's name or insurance information. I gave her my phone in the hopes that she would call me to set up a way to buy me a new bike. So I might not get one. I wish I wasn't so nice. In any case I can check "get hit by a car" off my list of things to do before I die. I'm just glad "get killed by a car hitting me" isn't on that list.

Florida is Strange

2009-05-12T08:29:00.000-07:00

Today I biked over to the school and I saw something strange. A guy was redoing his lawn. Not spreading grass seeds and watering it. No, he peeled his lawn up. Like taking a snowflake sticker off of your window when the snow melts. And he put squares of lawn on in their place. What the hell is that? Then on the way back, he was almost done. Less than an hour. Unbelievable. Where I'm from it takes a season to fix your lawn. The entire spring. Longer sometimes, if you aren't lucky. This state makes me glad I'm a yankee.

Best!

In the Valley of The Dollhouse

2009-05-09T17:08:00.000-07:00

Okay, so last night was the season finale of Dollhouse. It was awesome. There's just one problem with it: it was the lowest rated episode of the season. Which didn't surprise me because the ratings have been steadily decreasing since the first episode. That sucks like no one's business because the show is so good and now there is only a slim chance that it'll be brought back next season despite it's strong DVR numbers. I hope that the DVD sells good enough to make the execs at FOX see how awesome the show is and renew it.

I have the next five days in a row off. That's awesome. I plan on doing a lot of writing. After all, that comic ain't gonna write itself. I'm also going to catch up on my DVRs. God bless that machine.

Best!

EDIT: So Android pointed out to me that I wrote finally instead of finale and It's self instead of itself. My bad. There, I fixed it.

Alas, Poor Dorian

2009-05-06T18:35:00.000-07:00

Scrubs just ended. And even though it isn't the official series Finale, it is done in its current incarnation. The finale was so heartwarmingly sad that I actually cried. Like a baby. I love that show. Thank you Matt Dangelantonio, for showing me the unadulterated awesomeness that is Scrubs. It's made my life better.

Scrubs, you will be missed.

EDIT: I just watched it again (today is 5/10/09) and I cried again. I didn't even cry at my grandmother's funeral. What the hell is wrong with me?

Pet Peeves, #1

2009-05-06T18:25:00.000-07:00

So after deciding to write about my quirks I got thinking: what else can I write about? How about things that bug me. Things like when people (read: Andy) pronounce Mario Mare-io. Andy started doing this to bug me but he's not the first person to do this. I've heard it before and goddamn does it make me crazy. First of all he says Mario in the start of Mario 64. For Christ's sake, why do people do this? If you do then stop it right now or everyone you love will stop speaking to you.

On a side note, my left pinky is completely asleep so every time I press shift it feels weird.

A Quirk About Me, #1

2009-05-05T20:37:00.000-07:00

I don't step on cracks. And when I walk I'm usually looking down as to avoid stepping on cracks. The reason for this is simple: that stupid rhyme we all learn when we're kids - "Step on a crack, break your mother's back." My mother does a lot of heavy lifting everyday so I don't want to jinx her. It's weird, I know. But if for some reason I step on a crack, I whisper "sorry Mom" just incase.

That's is just one of my many quirks. Stay tuned for more. Best!

Yes We Can't

2009-04-29T17:03:00.000-07:00

So I'm extremely broke right now. I mean really broke. I have enough money in my bank account to buy something that is eight cents. And you know who I blame? Obama. Barrack Obama. The president. He said he was going to change everything. And he did. Before I had money. Then Obama came and changed that. Now I have no money. Barrak Obama doesn't care about white people.

That thing that I do

2009-04-28T15:20:00.000-07:00

So I've been meaning to parlay my meanderings into what I am trying to do for a living. Namely writing comics. My ultimate goal is to write, create and run my own TV show. But for right now i want to write comic books. Currently I am writing the first issue of a series I am calling A Place Called Armageddon. The title is subject to change but the idea is pretty simple: An ancient demon tries to usurp the devil as ruler of Hell. To do this he finds a way to unleash it on Orlando, FL. The Devil isn't stupid though, so she (yeah it's a lady) make an impenetrable barrier around the city and chooses seven young adults to fix her "little" problem. Each of them is given a unique power to help with this challenge.

Now I don't know about you, but I would totally read that. It's biblical shenanigans paired up with Whedonesque characterization and I know that I sound like a little bit pretentious when I say it that way but come on. That's good entertainment.

Best!

Steampunk

2009-04-27T19:49:00.000-07:00

I fraking love steampunk. It is awesome all over the place. Cogs and sprockets and steam and coal. I love it so much. I am actually plotting out a movie set in a steampunk universe. If you don't know anything about steampunk I definately suggest checking it out. Image copyright PReilly. Check him out on Deviantart. Unfortunately, I don't know how to hyperlink on the internet. I'll have to have Android show me how.

Blag, Blag, Blag

2009-04-24T11:36:00.000-07:00

So, I'm the DP in for my commercial shoot but I'm not entirely sure what a DP does. At least not for the commercial. It's supposed to be cold but we live in central Florida where the ten day forecast is all in the eighties. Making it look cold is going to be a challenge.

Best!

Chillin' at the Grandparents

2009-04-23T14:56:00.000-07:00

Yeah, I'm in Port Orange hanging out with my Grandparents, my mom, my auntie Patty, and my little brother. My Step-Nana Marie is weird. I think she thinks I'm stupid or something. The best part about me writing this less than fifteen feet away from her is I know for a fact that she doesn't know what a blog is, let alone how to find mine. But she makes my Papa happy so what can I do?

Best!

I'm trying to think of a title

2009-04-22T07:32:00.000-07:00

But I guess that works. I want to take this time to talk about pigs. I love those fat pink creatures. Maybe it's just me but I think that they are adorable. Plus when they get too old, you can turn them into bacon. It's the perfect animal.

Coming soon, to a theater near you

2009-04-18T17:31:00.000-07:00

I'll post my FX Day 2 stuff tomorrow. I'm too lazy right now. Also Supernatural is an awesome show. I'm watching season two of it right now.

Best!

Update

2009-04-17T20:02:00.000-07:00

Sorry about the giant gaps between paragraphs. I'm kind of Internet retarded.

FX International, Day 1 Part 2

2009-04-17T19:07:00.000-07:00

I promised the rest of my findings and here they are:

I got a cavalcade of signatures from Buffy and Angel Alumni. Even though they were all really cool and totally approachable I have to say that Camden Toy (who played a host of monster on both shows) and Claire Kramer (Who played an evil God) were the nicest. I must have talked to Mr. Toy for twenty minutes or so about his experiences in prosthetics. And Ms. Kramer was extremely nice too. we talked about how there was no good pictures in the Buffy Chosen Collection Booklet of her. She wrote the second best signature "Be A God XOXO". Isn't that

awesome?

I also got Jonathan Hickman and Jim Cheung to sign all three issues of Secret Warriors. Jonathan Hickman is a crop-dusting genius. We talked for a while too. He was very secretive about the future of the book. He did say that because Matt Fraction, who had to pull out because of illness, wasn't there that he would be making all sorts of lies up about his two books tomorrow at the Dark Reign panel. I'm excited.

Right after i talked to Hickman I talked to Jim McCann, who is an editor and writes New Avengers Reunion. He was awesome. And He had to use my Sharpee because he forgot his. He wrote the best signature of the day - "To JJ, Best!" That is probably the coolest thing I have ever read. That's how I'm going to sign all of my things from now on.

I also met Stuart Immonen and his wife Kathryn. Stuart was the artist for Ultimate Spider-Man up until recently. He also did Nextwave: Agents of H.A.T.E., Which is what I got signed. I talked to his wife about Runaways, one of my favorite titles, because she's going to be writing it starting with the June issue. They were both wicked nice. After them I talked to Chuck Dixon, who has written so much it's scary. I got two issues of Booster Gold Signed. He was really cool. And really tall. Then I went to get Ignition City signed by the artist who is not from this country so I had a little trouble talking to him because his english is not so much. He was nice though.

Lastly, for real this time, I talked to Jake "The Snake" Roberts. He is a semi-retired pro-wrestler who I just happen to be named after. He was wicked funny. I also talked to Scotty 2 Hotty. He used to wrestle for WWE. Like Me, He's a New Englander. But unlike me he's from Maine.

That's all for now. I'll be back tomorrow with more. Best!

FX International, Day 1 Part 1

2009-04-17T15:29:00.000-07:00

This post will be filled with pictures, so be warned. I got a lot of stuff signed and and boy howdy was it awesome.

First things first:I love Firefly and Serenity. So much so that I have five copies of Serenity - Collectors edition, Regular edition (full screen and wide screen), Blu-ray and HD-DVD. I love all that is Whedon and Firefly was no exception. So when I got a chance to meet Jewel Staite (Kaylee) and Morena Baccarin (Inara) I leaped at it. I got them to sign the issues of Serenity: Those Left Behind that they were featured on.

Next up I got all nine issues of Fell signed by Ben Templesmith. We talked for what seemed like fifteen minutes, because it was around fifteen minutes. He was an awesome guy and he even gave me a Wormwood One-Shot for free, but don't tell anyone I told you. He made me promise.

Actually I just realized that i lied to you. The first things I got signed were from Christos Gage. He signed an issue of Avengers: Initiative, House of M: Avengers (which I also got signed by the artist and the colorist), Gen13: Armageddon, and #1 of the Authority Prime. I also got the first poster of 50 for his upcoming Absolution for Avatar Press.

That's all for this one but a little later I'll post the other pictures. Spoiler: Some are pictures of comics with signatures on them.

Off To See the Wizard

2009-04-16T20:27:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow I'm going to FX International in Orlando. I'm going to meet Jewel Staite, Morena Baccarin, Matt Fraction and Ben Templesmith tomorrow. I'm so excited that I might pass out when I meet them. But on saturday I get to meet James Marsters. That's right THE James Marsters. The same guy who played Spike on Buffy the Vampire Slayer for six years. that show shaped who I am as a person. I can't wait.

The other reason I'm so excited is because, as an aspiring comic writer, I'll get to meet some of the people I idolize. And on saturday there is a panel for people who want to break into comics, which for those of you just tuning in, is me!

I have to go, it's late and I am an early bird. Plus I need to write my blog address on all the money I have. It's good marketing, money changes hands a lot in one day. And if you are reading this right now because of said money, thank you. You did a good thing today. Tell your friends.

The Shape of Things To Come

2009-04-15T16:25:00.000-07:00

So here it is. The first post of my first blog ever. I'm excited. I can't convey tone but trust me, I'm excited. I'd like to take this opportunity to talk about myself because, hey, this is my blog.

First off, I'm from New Hampshire. That's the little one all the way at the top that's 69ing with Vermont. For the record, NH is the boy in this relationship. I'm very proud to be from New Hampshire. My family got off the Mayflower in fact so how's that for heritage. I'll stop here because I'm sure I'll be talking about the NH a lot more.

Second, I go to film school. Yep, Full Sail University in Winter Park Florida. I'm in my seventh month and I love it. My goal is to Create and run my own TV show and there is no such thing as TV school.

Third, Fourth, Fifth and Sixth, I love comics, TV, wrestling and Video games. I'm a nerd of the highest caliber and damn proud of it. I got to go now because I think I'm break some law of the internet by writing this long. And spelling everything correctly.